Each time ‘Malar’ comes back to her childhood home , she finds herself being reminded of her families struggling yet delightful days. Even if they had little then, but after years now it somehow makes her feel how contently full those days were.
Her family belonged to a middle class division. She tells me how vividly she recalls her father maintaining a diary back then where he used to list down the monthly expenditure and at the end of each page contained a cell where his father used to draw a conclusion of the over consumption of money. She realised since the childhood days itself that her parents had money problems, but never did it ever occur to her that despite of all how were they able to fulfill not all but most of her wishes. Love , simple reason was Love. The kind of Love parents shower on their kids is one of the truest forms of affection.
‘Malar’s family wasn’t like this when her elder sister was born’ , she says. Malar’s father was quite young when he had started working and it was purely his sharp mind and features which had landed him one of the finest jobs back in 1980s. Brought up in a family of 5 siblings , Malar’s father never considered saving his fortune , despite he openly shared it with everyone around. He was one of the most generous person in the family. When Malar’s elder sister was born ,her father was pursuing his courses for a bachelor’s degree to upgrade himself for the future needs. But due to his relatives unavoidable quarrelsome behaviour he couldn’t complete and dropped out of college. Eventually sooner the renowned company in which his father was working was shut down too, but due to his father’s intelligence it wasn’t too late when he got into another job ,not as good as the last one though. But, Malar’s family had both her parents as a working professional so it was, ‘Manageable’ .
But it was the same time Malar was born . Her family couldn’t afford to spoil her with the same amount of lavish lifestyle her elder sister had when she was born. Malar’s mom recalls those days as one of the toughest times of their lives. They barely had ration to consume on daily basis. And living in a joint family with haters around , her mother hardly had anyone to support in her husbands absence . All this was still manageable due to his father’s strong will and mother’s unconditional Love.
And just like the objects in the mirror appear closer than they are. Everything you want is also closer, perhaps just the next door, but all it takes is just the courage to unfold that fine sheet of ‘Self doubt’, we have been wrapped around with, which is setting it far apart from your reach.
Kaurageous 